Are Popes Really Needed?: Historical Biography

EXCERPT
According to some well informed individuals, someone is seriously interested in brainwashing the masses and make them believe anything. A new world order. And more and more paranoid souls on the other front. It's quite sad, and as well intriguing that history gets rewritten over and over again; some documents disappear, while new ones come out of nowhere with fascinating revelations and of course interpretations. It's also interesting that history books of other countries differ substantially. Who's telling the truth, and, does it really matter?
Was Galileo such a bad guy, the scientist who needed to know everything and create conflicts with our dogmas? Are these charlatans still meeting by the Bernini's masterpiece The Ecstasy of St. Theresa? What's the secret path, and what's the metaphor in it?
As you're well aware, the Vatican is visited by over thirty million souls every year, and it's somehow challenging to keep track of everyone who mingles and concocts new historical drama around here.
Once upon a time the Roman Church was the only government; it told kings what to do, it financed monarchies, it made laws, it was the only game in town. What's our game now? What's up with the embassy in Washington built in the late eighties? The last and most fascinating theory is that inside the catacombs underneath the Vatican, we're keeping the ashes of St. Peter, and of course Jesus Christ, perhaps even against his will, according to the Church of England. The reason they're both here is because St. Peter was the very first one to see Christ's resurrection, he wasn't, so he was instructed to build his own place, but apparently they didn't get along well after completion, and after my extensive walks at night I couldn't find neither.
Money, yes you heard that right. We have plenty of money, we have plenty of gold, and, and... what are the consequences? Why so many popes ended up dead? Power. Secret societies again, or, God forgives me, some other conspiracy?
We had an intruder not too long ago who made a humble attempt to take possession of important documents from the Vatican's archives, papers about the Church involvement in the holocaust and numerous writings by Galileo and Copernicus; he had a long walk inside, because our library is fifty miles long. Another Illuminati's special?
As you can well imagine, being a pope is a tough job, Sunday messages, diplomatic ties, investments, keeping track of priests with hidden life instincts, gathering intelligence on secret societies, and staying alive.